As I Climb The Spanish Steps

“No feeling is final.”… Rainer Maria Rilke

***

The questions are deafening.

I turn up the music pulsing through my headphones, close my eyes, and pursue a world where the cries that only I can hear drift away and disappear.

Sadness is my companion, and speaks to me through the enchanting melodies of Keiko Matsui.

Tears meander aimlessly from my eyes. Even they have no real destination, and like myself simply seek to move away from what is broken.

The beat follows no matter where I turn. I can’t find a way to twist myself inside out and cast aside what remains of my heart.

Tangerine Dream emerges from the fog, and though the grey matter is thick, there’s a certain spring to my step.

I almost smile.

Music soothes my soul. Many times it’s a long journey, but it always leads me to a place of peace, where though the questions remain unsolved, I learn to love patience.

My left foot asks permission of the right to move forward.

I’m glad that life is not a race.

Is there any reason to be in a hurry if the journey is endless?

Up the Spanish Steps I go.

I see light in the distance.

***

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions”…Rainer Maria Rilke